I think there should be a single mom Olympics. Furthermore, I have a few new sports that I’d like to suggest. As of this morning, I invented Trash Skiing. Really, anyone can choose to participate in this sport. What you need:
• Live at the top of a steep hill
• A harmless looking dusting of snow and ice
• A heavy Rubbermaid trashcan – filled, and missing a lid
• High-heeled boots
Now that you’re ready, roll the trash can out onto the driveway. Be sure to place the trashcan in front of you. If you try to pull the trashcan down the driveway, you will simply become the victim of a hit and slide trashing. It should only take two steps to get going. I slid half-way down my drive way this morning till I dug the heels of my boots into the division between the pads of concrete. I then inched my way over to the icy pine-needle lawn. This didn’t slow down my skiing, but promised a nicer landing if I fell. Unless you have Sherpa, getting back up the drive way is the hard part. I made it with the help of holding on to the little twiggy branches of the bush outside my garage. Who knew? Landscaping has a practical purpose.
Since I had conquered the hill as Trash Ski champion, I decided to not take down the rest of the trash in that fashion. I loaded the remaining trash bags into the back of the Honda. I backed down the drive way and stopped in front of the mailbox. I then put the car into Park, got out and held on to the car as I walked across the ice to the back/trunk. This was when I invented Trash Tossing. I launched one bag after another neatly into place, and I informed Bella that if Mommy were to slide under the car not to panic. Finally, the trash was taken out and we were on our way.
6 comments:
wow i'd pay money to see that :)
i think i now love my straight , flat , driveway.
Sa
I take back what i said about my driveway. I wiped out hard this morning. i hate all ice covered driveways flat or hilly. i need some ibuprofin........ Sa
ouch. Where was your trashcan? You need a trashcan to hold on to.
i was walking to the trash can to put some stuff in it. wiped out right in front of it.
Damn, I bet that was funny. : )
I had such a complete mental picture of you doing it. I would have been laughing my ass off except I walked my daughter up to the bus stop and had to play that balance game down the driveway and up the street (all at a slight grade.) Way to improvise.
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