Her Dream Date

While my daughter has long since stripped Prince Charming, Ken, of his clothes and tossed him behind a chair, she is not without her dreams of dating. The entire family became keenly aware of this over the weekend, when a harmless joke was revealed as all too serious to Bella.

A cousin got married this weekend, my brother and I decided to carpool as I don't want to tool around Granite City alone. My brother said, "What color are you wearing Bella?" "PINK!" "Okay, I'll get a pink tie and be your date."

He picked us up sporting his lovely pink tie, and we attended the ceremony with minimal mishaps.

Mishap 1:
Seated directly in front of us was my Aunt and ex-Aunt. My Uncle's first wife and now second wife. Seated directly behind us was my Uncle's Ex-fiance, a relationship that last my entire childhood. Awkward.

Mishap 2:
After shaking hands with the all of the people behind us, my brother over hears the following "How's your eye?" "I'm trying not to touch it. I don't want it to get all pink and ooze, again."

My brother then demands I not touch my daughter. I trust he has good reason, but I can not imagine why. He types the "pink eye" alert into his phone, which is then passed down the pew. Thankfully, Aunt Mary arrives with hand sanitizer.

Near Mishap:
As my Uncle walks my cousin down the aisle, Bella turns to my mother and quietly asks, "Why did they have the baby shower before the wedding?"

You may now kiss the bride, and we are off to Walgreens for more hand sanitizer and alcohol swabs. Finally, after a stint of killing time between wedding and reception we are seated. My brother and I watch the clock and go out for periodic "sky watch" hoping that the Italian dinner will be served before sundown. Italian dinner means a lot of pasta and breaded meat. Sundown this past Saturday meant Passover for us.

Mmmmm. Vegetables and chicken scraped clean. During dinner, Bella interrupts my brother with a kiss and turns to her little friend, "SEE!" "What was that all about?" I said.

Finally, the dancing begins! My brother takes Bella out on the dance floor. My Dad dances with my mom. Next slow song, I'm dancing with my Dad when we can hear Bella cry over the crowd and music. I leave the dance floor wondering what is wrong. Her little friend explains, "She can't find her date." We turn to see my brother on the dance floor with that hussy Nonna. How dare my grandma steal my daughter's date! Nothing can console Bella, but to have her date returned to her. A long evening ends with Bella once again in tears over not catching the bouquet and her swearing off dating and weddings for the rest of her life.

When we get home my brother carries her up to her room and tucks her in bed. I think the boys of the future have some big shoes to fill.