Yeast Infections Aren't Sexy

Ladies,
I think we need to unite in defense of our health, comfort and sex lives. I currently don't have one, but even solitaire sex cannot be had when a yeast infection has infiltrated our sacred ground.

So, as soon as one gets a yeast infection one immediately begins to think underwear. Where is my nice, dry, well-fitted cotton underwear? Bottom of the laundry? Bottom of the drawer? Do I own any? And then this got me to wondering why in the hell am I not wearing the damn cotton underwear to begin with? Why? Because we have a misogynistic pantie crisis in this country. A country where to wear white cotton panties that cover your ass and let your crotch breathe is to be deemed the worst kind of prude. Well, my answer to that is a yeast infection ain't sexy!

And don't give me the "get the pretty panties with the cotton crouch" crap as a solution or compromise. A tiny diamond patch of cotton as a barrier between the silk, satin, rayon or poly blend panties and your little lady is not cutting it. Let the little lady breathe! A compromise won't work.

And the last time I tried to compromise between the so-called sexy pantie and the need for cotton, I got the bright idea, along with some crafty engineers at Victoria's Secret, to try a cotton thong. Thongs are sexy. Cotton breathes. It sounds like a solution. I gotta tell you right now. I don't like any solution that leaves my ass hanging out. And covering the crack, ain't covering the ass. If I cover the keyhole, I'm not concealing the door.

In short, I want to know why we women are willing to tolerate yeast infections and pre-meditated wedgies so men can walk around with the idea that under our clothes we're sexy. Well hell, under my panties I'm naked! Beat that Victoria's Secret. So, I say take back the comfort, take back the health, free the crotch and cover the ass. Let's reclaim the cotton pantie.