On My Toes

On her toes and up my ass. Jesus, lady, chill out. When I first signed Bella up for dance lessons at On Your Toes dance studio the age of 4, I sat in on her orientation to get the parent info. The young girl said, “Miss Kelly likes to send out emails…” The father next to me mumbled, “You’re not a kiddin.” He was right.

That woman sent out a ton of emails, and a lot of them were personal emails. I had never even met her directly, but I knew all about the failing health of her grandfather, his death 6 months later, the remission of her best friend’s cancer, her pregnancy, the number of times she runs from the studio to the bathroom to be sick, the advent of Webkins in the studio store, and the actual arrival of every shipment of Webkins till she decided to siphon that information off to interested parties only.

Just last week, in one day, Miss Kelly sent out 7 emails about the recital in June. The following is an excerpt from today’s email:

A note about recital tights:

1. Some dancers may have tights that are still in good condition from last year or their current year that they may use for recital. They do not have to be brand new tights, however, they do need to be in good condition with no holes or runs.

2. All recital tights are encouraged to be purchased much sooner than later to make sure we have the correct size and color in stock at the store.

Okay, okay I will buy new tights for the recital. I know I need to be diligent on this matter. It’s not like I have months to go before I, wait, yes, I do in fact have several months to go until the recital. And these children tend to grow. Lady, back off!

- Proud Parent of a Ballerina